When the risk is really the opposite of what we think
Sometimes the cost of not doing something is just too high...
A couple of weeks ago, my husband and I were in the car having a deeply honest conversation about our family and what is on the horizon for us. Sometimes a trip to Wegmans to pick up the groceries is the closest thing to “us” time we get across the work week.
Right now, we are in the absolute thick of it, raising little humans who are still really little kids. We are talking about koala babies on the hip, night wakeups (and night cuddles), never going to the bathroom alone, and children who innocently waltz into work calls when they get home from school (currently in the process of implementing a stop sign on my door).
There is a lot on all of the plates. And it’s a very full life.
So it feels crazy to add more of anything. In fact it feels like the perfectly wrong time for adding anything else, doing more, trying new things. And for the specific thing we were talking about in that car ride, we kept using the word “risky” to describe our hesitation - “risky” to potentially disrupt the familiarity (and comfort) of our current dynamic.
And then it popped into my head - How do we even know this thing would even be more risky? Different? Undoubtedly, yes. New territory? Undoubtedly, also yes. But risky, even though it matched our feelings in the moment, was a funny word to use when we, if we are being truly honest, have absolutely no idea of what is on the other side of that leap.
Because if I look back - there was never really a good time for me to stretch and be uncomfortable with something new or experiment with something more. For instance, the time I started a five year professional program when I was already halfway done with college. Or the time I was riding the waves of extreme work and financial pressure when I first decided to invest my time and some big resources in mindset and manifestation. When I was figuring out how to be a new parent at the same time we moved houses and I started the brand new job I had manifested for myself. I had literally just had my second baby when I pressed send on my first Wayshow Collective newsletter. Last but not least, getting a little beagle puppy when our daughter was not even a year old yet will always be a *special* decision.
And yet, through all these things, life unfolded even better than I could have imagined. New opportunities, new joys, new experiences that made life richer, deeper, and more authentic to me.
It will always be a funny thing to me that, as humans, our brains are biologically wired to keep us safe and comfortable when our souls are literally here to expand and grow. I’m pretty sure that, if given the opportunity to experience life in all of its abundance, joy, and possibility, we would leap towards this timeline. But how many times do we shut down possibilities before we begin that journey just because that next step is in unfamiliar territory?
Almost anything out of the ordinary looks and feels risky and scary, if I’m being honest. All the things I listed above, and some not mentioned, scared me and some of them still scare me. But when I look back - each of the scary things I’ve done has far created a new chapter that was more rewarding than I could have anticipated. This is what I’ve observed and this is the truth I choose to anchor to.
BUT!
Yes, this is my truth, and it has served me enormously and expansively. But I would be remiss in not being honest about the second part of the equation beyond the “go for it.” The kind of mindset that looks beyond the fear is the opener to a more authentic life - fact. But the bringer of all things good, the secret to navigating the challenges that ensue and what really DELIVERS the better than expected outcomes? A nervous system that can ride on the journey with you.
So, in what is a newsletter / blog first, there will be a second part to this, so that you get the whole picture.
